


2 a.m.

by Lexilindale35



Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Best Friends, Exes, F/M, Single Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-22
Updated: 2017-03-22
Packaged: 2018-10-09 09:05:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10408719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexilindale35/pseuds/Lexilindale35
Summary: Nesta finds her ex best friend/ex boyfriend on her porch with a child in his arms."Cassian? What in the world, it's two in the morning."Nesta pulled open her front door to find her once best friend slash ex slash person who confused her beyond reason standing on her front porch. His eyes were red and his hair was sticking up every which way. But there he was, on her porch. Holding a child in his arms. A little boy who looked exactly like him.





	

**Author's Note:**

> probably one of my favorite works right now.   
> The idea hit me while driving of cassian with a son.  
> I hope you guys like this beast. I love it.

"Cassian? What in the world, it's two in the morning."

Nesta pulled open her front door to find her once best friend slash ex slash person who confused her beyond reason standing on her front porch. His eyes were red and his hair was sticking up every which way. But there he was, on her porch. Holding a child in his arms. A little boy who looked exactly like him.

He sighed. The boy, who couldn't have been older than three, clung to him. He looked half asleep and terrified of wherever he was. Cassian winced as Nesta glared at the man who had taken her heart and torn it apart inside her chest. She wasn't sure how it was still beating.

"I know we haven't really talked in the last three years. But I um," he looked into those gray blue eyes that seemed to be made of steel, her jaw set tight, and he felt it. How much he missed her. How she was the only one he wanted to ask for help, "I had nowhere else to go."

Nesta bit the inside of her lip and then looked at the boy in his arms, "who's this?"

Cassian smiled then, lifting the tired child closer to the girl who still meant the world to him, "this is Ash, my son. His mother decided she likes freedom more than him and well. She left him with me."

Nesta's jaw dropped. She had been keeping tabs on her former best friend. She asked Rhysand about him constantly, but not even Feyre told her he had had a child. She stepped out of the doorway and let him pass. He walked into what used to be their apartment with ease. As if he hadn't been gone for three years.

As if he still lived here beside her.

"You have a son," she said quietly, trying to process the information, "I didn't know."

"I asked them not to tell you. But now. I need you Nesta," his voice broke and she knew whatever insults she wanted to throw at him were lost. Because he looked so broken, so scared and in need of someone, she couldn't hurt him more.

Nesta reached for Ash. At first he didn’t want her to hold him, but then he settled against her. His sleepy body gave up trying to fight her, "hi," she smiled as Cassian fell onto the couch, "I'm Nesta. Are you sleepy? I have a really big bed."

Ash nodded his head slowly, looking at his dad before leaning his head on her shoulder, "it's okay buddy. I'll be right here."

Cassian closed his eyes as Nesta walked up the stairs and put the little boy in her bed. He settled as she tucked him in and then he closed his eyes. He looked so much like his father it hurt. His dark hair fell in loose curls. His brown eyes held so much in them she couldn't believe he was only a few years old.

Nesta remembered all the nights she used to fall asleep beside his father. His face peaceful and boyish in his sleep. The memories were so real, so suffocating, that she couldn't stop herself from leaning in and kissing his cheek before she left him to sleep.

She found Cassian still on the couch, his eyes still closed. She cleared her throat and crossed her arms as she looked at him, "what happened Cass? Why didn't you go to Rhys? Or hell Azriel and Mor for that matter."

He shook his head before opening his eyes, "I came home from work and Calla was there in my kitchen holding Ash. She had all his stuff and just handed him to me. She said she couldn't do this anymore and just walked out before I understood. Don't get me wrong I love that little boy. But I've never been his sole parent. I've always been dad, the friend. How do I become dad the caretaker?"

Nesta raised an eyebrow, "but why me?"

Cassian's head fell forward as he thought over why he had chosen Nesta. He didn't really know the answer. 

Because his feet had brought him here after missing her for so long? Because he wanted to see her? Because he broke her heart and he knew it was his fault they had fallen apart? Because he never wanted a child with anyone except her?

"Because I knew you would drop everything to help me. Even if it's 2 am."

Nesta took a step closer, "Cassian."

He grabbed her wrist and looked at the girl who had once been his entire world. Before he fucked it all up and ended whatever future they might have had together. Because he was an asshole and a cheater. Because he couldn't say no even when he knew he was in love with her. He threw it all away for one night with a blonde who wasn't worth it.

"I need my best friend," he whispered as tears filled his eyes. Nesta only saw Cassian cry once in her life. It was the night he told her the truth about Calla. The night she refused to cry in front of him and she turned cold. He cried when she told him to get out and never come back. 

His voice shook slightly, “no matter what has happened between us, Nes. You're still my best friend.” He paused and then looked away, "I know you hate me, that you can't forgive me. I was selfish and I hurt you. I'm sorry Nesta," his tear filled eyes found hers again, "I never should've done it."

"I don't hate you. Not anymore," her voice was soft and she fought off tears, "I might have cursed your name, but I never wanted you to feel the pain I did when you left."

He nodded, "I never wanted her. But then Ash came along and she was in my life. She was here and you weren't. I love my son. But I wish with everything inside me that it was you Nesta."

She pressed her hand against his cheek, "Cassian."

Nesta's knees buckled under the weight of his words and she sat down on the couch beside him. She sighed, not sure what to think, how to feel about the turn of events. She reached up and touched Cassian's hair.

She had waited years to hear those words. To look into those brown eyes and know he truly meant them, that he was sorry. She thought seeing him in pain, the same pain he had handed her, would help. But she knew now that it had happened she didn't want him to hurt. She didn't want him to suffer.

And that told her everything she needed to know. He was still there inside her heart, embedded in her soul.

"He looks just like you," she said quietly as he continued to hold her other hand.

"Yeah. He's a handful like me too," he whispered closing his eyes, "thank you. For giving him your bed."

Nesta shrugged, her tiny apartment wasn't exactly spacious. But she loved where she lived. It had been her first home. Her first choice to live with the man she thought she would spend forever with. Once it had been their bed. Those nights were long gone and the sheets on his side were always cold.

But Nesta could never forget the way it felt sleeping beside him, wrapped in his arms.

"What are you going to do?" Her voice was soft, but Cassian knew she wasn't judging him. She was asking him, she wanted to help him.

He sighed, shaking his head, "what I have to do. I'm his father, the only parent he has left."

The room fell quiet as Nesta thought over his words. She bit her lip, knowing the moment she spoke she would be forcing her hand and she would never be able to go back again. But she couldn't let her best friend, the only person to see every single part of her and more, do this alone.

She laced their fingers together and squeezed his hand gently. Cassian's big brown eyes came to land on hers, shocked at her move. She gave him a small smile, a little ray of hope in the mess he had found himself in.

"Well you won't be alone. I've got you Cass," these were the words he had once whispered to her. All those years ago, when happily ever after had seemed within their reach, "we can figure everything out in the morning. Let's sleep."

She pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and laid down with her feet touching his legs. Cassian followed, smiling for a moment too long at her words. He wanted to kiss her, to hug her and thank her for not forcing him out. But he didn't want to scare her.

So he laid his head down on his pillow and thanked all the gods and goddesses he could think of for this moment. Because Nesta Acheron, the one he foolishly let go, had finally forgiven him.

***

Nesta woke up to a tiny little voice giggling. Her back was screaming and her hands were cold. For a moment she wasn't sure how she ended up here. It had all felt like a dream. Her ex showing up and crying, asking her to help him. It was a hazy dream, but one she clearly remembered.

She looked around the room and shivered. The couch was empty and the house smelled like bacon. She sat up and saw that Cassian was gone, but his warmth still lingered on the cushions. She was starting to believe she had really made it all up.

But it hadn't been a dream, something fell in the kitchen. She heard that little giggle again and she remembered Ash, the weight of him in her arms. She remembered Cassian's admission, the tears in his eyes. It had been as real as this moment.

Her heart jumped into her throat. Cassian had finally come back.

He was singing loudly as his son laughed at his impressions. Nesta stopped short of standing up. Cassian had a son. A son to a woman she didn't know. The woman he had left her for. And now Calla had left the man who broke her heart. The best man, the best friend she had ever had. 

Calla didn't deserve him. But then again neither did Nesta. 

She was the one who wouldn't speak to him for over two years. She was the one who pushed him out, she was the one who cut him off.

But she was the one he came to when his world came crashing down.

She pushed her hair off her forehead as little eyes found hers. He stood in the doorway that led to the kitchen. She smiled sweetly as Ash ran and grabbed his father's leg. Cassian stumbled, before he realized that Ash was hiding from Nesta.

"Da," he whispered softly.

Cassian smiled, pulling him off his leg and up into his big arms. Ash nestled into his chest as Nesta joined them in the kitchen, "Ash, this is Nesta. She's my friend."

"Hey," she ruffled his hair, "I let you sleep in my bed, little one."

He giggled as she tickled his exposed foot, "fank you," his voice was soft and Nesta didn't believe Cassian. He didn't seem as out of hand as the man she had come to know. He was shy and reserved. He reminded her more of Azriel than the man holding him.

"Don't worry he'll warm up to you," Cassian said over his head as Ash buried his face in his father's neck.

Nesta nodded and then looked down at her pajamas. She blushed slightly, "this smells amazing, Cass. You didn't have to cook."

He shrugged, "it's the least I could do. You let me cry on your shoulder at 2 a.m. Even after everything that's happened. I just, thank you."

Nesta smiled, "I'm going to get dressed. Hey Ash, want to get dressed too?"

He pulled his face away from Cassian's shoulder and looked at Nesta. His little eyes went to his dad and then back again. He didn't speak, he just nodded his head.

Cassian's eyes met hers as he handed his son over, "thank you," he whispered softly as she took his son back to her room.

"Okay so what do you want to wear?" She asked as he opened his duffel bag. He pulled out a little green shirt with the name of a fictional place on it and a pair of soft black pants. Nesta smiled, "perfect."

She grabbed a pair of leggings and a soft maroon shirt. Nesta got dressed quickly and then helped Ash into his clothes. She pulled him onto her lap and started to brush his hair.

"Can you say Nesta? My name is Nesta."

He looked at her with those big brown eyes and she got lost in them. Because he was such a replica of his father she couldn't help but remember all the time that had been taken from them. All the kisses they had shared, all the promises they had made. Nesta felt a stab at her heart as Ash kept staring.

"Nessa," he whispered with a small smile.

Nesta gasped, "ah! You said it."

She laughed as he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her. Nesta felt tears in her eyes. She had never been someone who wanted children with everything she was. But she wanted this child to like her. She wanted this baby to be important to her. He said her name and suddenly she realized exactly why mother's got emotional as easily as they did.

Nesta carried him back into the kitchen. She smiled as he got down and walked to the table. Nesta sighed as she stood beside Cassian who finished making the pancakes.

"So what is your plan Cass? You've got a full time job, a good job. But he needs you."

Cassian winced, "I called off today. I told Rhys I needed the day off. I haven't told anyone that Calla left. They all already hated her, with what happened between us and how she broke up the group. I don't want to hear them say I told you so."

Nesta nodded, "you need to tell them though," her voice was soft, "I can tell them with you."

He gave her a tight nod, "okay. But today is my free day. I'll figure everything out in 12 hours. Right now I want to spend the day with my son," he paused and his eyes met hers, "and you. If you'll have us."

Nesta couldn't remember a moment when Cassian asked something instead of demanded it. She loved him, she had never stopped loving him. He was her person, her first and only love. She could never deny him anything, it's how he knew he could come here and she would help him.

But she had couldn't stop herself as he reached out and touched her waist, "I would love to spend today with you two," she smiled at Ash's little giggle, "but I need you to know the truth."

Cassian waited. Nesta bit the inside of her lip, her heart pounding. She didn't want to lie, but she wasn't ready to offer him everything just yet. She wasn’t ready to break down the walls that had been built after he hurt her. Three years wasn’t enough time to forget everything he had done. How he had touched someone else, when he claimed to have loved her with his entire heart.

He turned the stove off and Ash giggled loudly again, "Nessa!"

She smiled as Cassian gasped, "he said your name."

"We had a moment in the bedroom," she shrugged and looked at the little boy. He swung hit feet as he sat on a chair. He looked proud to have gotten up on it all by himself.

Her eyes wandered back to his father, "Cassian I'm seeing someone."

She watched as his entire face fell. One moment he was excited to see her, that his child had said her name. Then the next he was falling. His lips turned down and his body sagged slightly. She had pulled the rug out from under him. Before this moment it would’ve made her feel better, knowing she had caused him a little bit of pain. Knowing that his disappointment was because she hadn’t waited for him.

But now she wanted to take back the words. She wanted to tell him the actual truth, that she hadn’t been able to find anyone as good as him. Anyone who made her heart stop and her skin burn the way he once had. She wasn’t ready for that yet. So she stood up taller and watched him process it all.

"I should've known you would find someone better," his voice was low, he wouldn’t look at her, "someone who deserves you."

Nesta touched his arm, "I'm sorry."

He nodded and she watched him swallow his tears. He stood up straighter and then he grabbed the plate full of food, "the food is going to get cold."

Cassian ended the conversation as he joined Ash around her table. Nesta didn't say anything else. She didn't tell Cassian his name or what he was to her. But Nesta knew if he pressed her he would get the truth. She had ended things with Tomas almost a week ago now. She wasn't committed, she didn't feel what he felt.

Because Cassian was still there inside her heart. She knew it the moment she opened that door. 

Nesta sat down and started to eat with both of her boys. She felt slightly proud to be the only one who knew what had happened with Cassian and the situation he found himself in. She was still the person he chose to share his secrets, the person who he wanted to come to in a time of need.

"So Ash," he smiled as his dad grabbed his piece of bacon out of his hands. Cassian wiggled his eyebrows as Ash did the same. Nesta could sit there and watch them for hours, they were adorable, "how old are you?"

He held up three fingers, "free!"

Cassian laughed, "he's small for a three year old."

Nesta could do the math. He was the reason Cassian had stopped fighting. This little boy who could pass as Cassian's twin was the reason he stayed with Calla after he broke her heart. Nesta would've told him to stay, she would've told him he couldn't abandon his child when he needed them the most.

She took a bite of food, "gosh your daddy is still the best cook I've ever known."

Cassian laughed, "she only says that because Nessa is a terrible cook."

Nesta smiled and shook her head, "don't fill his head with lies, Cass."

Somehow they turned breakfast into a conversation and they were laughing as the little boy watched them. Cassian teased Nesta and she flushed red. She gave it back and he just shook his head. They fell back into their normal routine. Best friends who had once been lovers. Cassian could remember the feel of her against him.

He wanted to remember the taste of her. He wanted to feel her again.

Nesta did the dishes and Ash pulled a chair over to help. She splashed him with bubbles and he laughed as they worked together. She was a natural, Cassian was in awe watching them. He couldn’t believe that this was the woman who told him she wasn't sure about children, if she even wanted any of her own. She was good with his son. He had already opened up for her.

A few hours later, after they had occupied him with toys, Ash was all but falling asleep on his feet. Nesta caught him when he ran into her arms, away from his father who chased him around the room. She scooped him up and he laid his head on her shoulder.

"I think someone needs a nap," she ran her hand up and down his back gently and the baby closed his eyes. Cassian watched as Nesta walked his son back to her room and laid him down without even asking him if it was alright.

Nesta sat on the edge of her bed, "Nessa," he whispered as he grabbed her hand. He wrapped his little fingers around hers and held on as he closed his eyes.

Emotions filled Nesta, some she had never felt before. He looked so small, so innocent as he fell asleep holding onto her. And she gave him security, he felt safe here with her. Cassian said he would warm up, but it never happens this fast. Ash looked at Nesta like she was important to him. This little boy looked at her the same way Cassian did. She felt her heart fill up.

She never thought she wanted kids. But she realized she wanted this kid. Cassian's kid.

Cassian came looking for her a few minutes later. She was running her fingers through Ash's dark hair, watching him sleep. She smiled at her best friend, putting her finger up to her lips. Cassian nodded and sat down beside her.

"You're good with him," he said quietly, "he loves you."

Nesta smiled, "don't look so surprised. I'm very lovable."

Cassian laughed, a sound Nesta had all but forgotten. She missed that sound, the beauty that rang in the vibration of his heart. It sank into her and brought color to her world. Cassian's laugh was beautiful and real. It reminded her of a time when life was perfect. When their ending was supposed to be so different.

Nesta pulled her hand out of Ash's, "we should let him sleep."

Cassian followed her out of the room. She closed her door and then walked back into the living room. She picked up a few of the toys he had been playing with so no one would fall. Cassian took them and put them in his bags.

"Nesta thank you," he meant to grab her wrist, but instead his hand found her waist. The warmth flooded through her and she felt her entire body tune towards his. She melted, her heart sang.

She leaned in as she stood up straighter. Her eyes were on his lips. She wanted him to bridge the distance, to press her up against the wall like he had so many times before. His thumb ran across her skin, making her heart skip a beat.

"You don't have to thank me," her voice was even steadier than she thought it would be, "it's what friends do."

He smiled, his fingers curling around her waist. He went to pull her closer, but before he could do it, before his lips could touch hers, there was a knock on the door. It wasn't a knock, but a thud. A loud, booming noise that forced them to jump apart. To come back to reality.

"Nesta!" Tomas's voice rang through her house, "Nesta open up!"

Nesta went still. Cassian could tell something was wrong. Her body was still close to his, he knew she didn't want whoever was on the other side of that door to come in.

"Tomas," she whispered as Cassian grabbed her hand.

"Is everything okay?"

She shook her head, "I lied. I'm not," she sighed feeling like a fool as he knocked again, "I broke up with him. A week ago. I don't care about him. He isn't taking it well."

"Do you want me to make him leave?"

She nodded, "please. If he keeps banging on that door he'll wake the baby."

Cassian flushed at the use of her words. He pulled away and then pulled the door open. There stood a small man, smaller than Cassian. He had blonde hair and he looked ready to piss himself when he found Cassian standing there instead of Nesta.

"Where is she?" He threw the words out and Nesta stayed out of sight, "I know she's home. I know she hasn't moved on."

Cassian clenched his fists, "she doesn't want to see you. I suggest you leave before I remove you from this doorway myself."

Tomas went to push him out of the way, but Cassian was faster. He pushed one shoulder and Tomas flew back. His fist connected with his eye before he could yell again. Tomas stumbled, his vision exploded. 

"There's a child sleeping," Cassian's deep voice got quiet and threatening, "if you wake him up I'll make sure your eyes match." 

He shut the door and locked it. Nesta's knees gave out and Cassian caught her. She held onto him with whatever strength she had left. Maybe this was what had brought him here. Maybe he just knew his best friend needed him too.

"Thank you," there were tears in her eyes, "I'm sorry I lied. I'm sorry I thought it would be better if you didn't have hope -"

Cassian stopped all her words, his lips sliding over hers. His hand found her waist again and this time he pulled her as close as she could get to him. Her fingers curled up in the front of his shirt as she kissed him. She had missed this, him. She had lost herself when he left. And there on her living room floor, kissing the brown eyed boy who had once been her world, she found herself again.

Nesta pulled away, Cassian feeling everything in that moment. Joy and sorrow, happiness and pain. He had this once, this had been his whenever and wherever he wanted her. But now he was afraid to move too fast. Afraid to startle whatever it was they had created last night. 

He hand slid to her cheek as her breathing turned heavy. Her eyes locked with his, her tongue darting out to lick her lips. The lips he had just been kissing. She smiled, her eyes on his lips as she leaned forward again and kissed him.

He picked her up and carried her to the couch. He sat down holding her, her arms wrapping around his neck. She pressed her chest against his, holding him tightly. His hands pushed her shirt up and off her back.

"Nesta," he moaned her name as she put one leg on either side of his waist. He kissed her neck, her jaw. He kissed every inch of exposed skin he could find.

She was dizzy as his hand slipped up her shirt and unhooked her bra. His touch was a drug, his kiss was the cure. She knew now why she couldn't date, why she pushed everyone who tried to get close away. Because this man, the only man she wanted, the one who's touch set her on fire, had ruined her for everyone else. 

He had broken her heart and now he was the only one who had enough pieces to put it back together again.

Nesta's hips moved against his as his thumb brushed over her breast. She gasped, he caught it in his mouth.

"Daddy!" A little voice brought them back to their senses. Nesta pulled back, her shirt was in disarray, his hair was a mess from her fingers. Her lips were swollen and her cheeks flushed. She slipped off his lap as Ash called for him again.

He wanted to ask what had happened, what this meant. But he didn't, he couldn't force the words out of his throat. He stood up and walked to her room, Nesta's steel gray eyes watching him as he went.

She knew in that moment she would never be able to untangle her heart from his.

***

Ash giggled loudly as he swung between Nesta and Cassian. They each held one of his hands, his feet slipping off the ground every so often. They had taken him out for dinner and then ice cream. Cassian had convinced Nesta it was a nice night and they should walk. Velaris was beautiful when the stars came out.

So Nesta agreed. They didn't talk about the kiss. They didn't talk about Tomas. Hell they didn't talk about Cassian suddenly becoming a single parent. They just talked about life, about themselves. They caught up on everything they had missed.

Nesta told Cassian she had been keeping tabs on him. He sheepishly told her he had been doing the same. Rhys had been giving them both information and telling them both to grow up and talk to each other. Neither one had listened and a year of silence had turned into two and then three. 

"I'm sorry," she said as they walked, Cassian still nursing his cone, "I should've reached out. I kicked you out. But I missed you. I shouldn't have put Rhys in that position."

Cassian swallowed a bite, "I didn't blame you when you didn't answer or when you hung up on me. I hurt you, in the worst way possible. I chose someone else, I kissed her and I knew there was no going back. I'm the one who's sorry Nesta."

"Maybe we can start fresh. We can be friends again," she offered, her heart already telling her that wasn't possible. She wanted to kiss him again. She wanted to fall into him and never find her way back out.

Ash giggled as Cassian swung him higher, "friends. It's better than nothing."

They walked towards her apartment. Nesta wasn't ready to let them go. She didn't want him to take Ash home and away from her. She wanted to help him, she wanted him to stay over again. But she had too much pride to ask. 

"So Feyre told me about Tomas," Cassian was quiet, "she told me he hurt you. What happened?"

Nesta shook her head, "he took and never gave. He didn't like my mouth," she remembered the bruises. She remembered the pain, "he liked control and I wouldn't give it to him."

Cassian cursed softly, "I should've hit him harder."

Nesta laughed, a sound he had been missing for three years. Her laughter was like the sun, it brightened his days and promised him an even brighter tomorrow. Making Nesta laugh was hard, so hard Cassian always told her he was going to find a way to bottle it up and sell it as a cure for rainy days.

"You didn't have to make him leave. Thanks Cass, for still protecting me."

"Doggy!" Ash pointed towards the town square and wiggled out his hands out of theirs. Then he ran off before they could stop him. He ran towards a dog and his owner, giggling loudly as the dog licked his nose.

Cassian smiled at the girl, "sorry he loves dogs. Come on buddy," he picked Ash up.

"Doggy!" He said again swinging his feet.

"Maybe we'll get you a doggy," he said and Ash's little face lit up. 

Nesta grabbed Cassian's arm, "hey don't make promises you don't intend to keep," she offered softly, "you can't be just friend dad. You have to be parent dad too."

"When you're a little older," Cassian added, Ash not understanding a word after doggy. Cassian carried him out of the square, Nesta never realizing her hand was still on his arm. Cassian didn't pull away, he didn't tell her to move either.

When they got back to Nesta's apartment Ash wiggled free and went to find his stuffed dog. Cassian turned to look at his best friend.

"Nesta."

“Cassian." 

He said her name as the same time she said his. They were awkward and shy, they were back to the beginning, where they had started.  

She smiled, "you go."

He blushed, "I just wanted to tell you that I um. Appreciate what you've done for me today. What it means to me that Ash likes you, that he feels safe with you."

She took a step forward, "I love that little boy already. He's just like you, he's adorable. You're going to be an amazing full time father. Anytime you need me, I'm here."

Neither one of them realized they had gotten closer with every step they took. But suddenly they were standing so close they were practically sharing the same air. Nesta's eyes went to his lips, his eyes stayed on hers. Nesta leaned in, Cassian was about to kiss her again.

"Daddy!" Ash pushed between them. His little eyes were heavy, "seep here?"

He held his stuffed dog close and looked up at his father. Nesta's face was on fire as she took a step back and grabbed a full breath of air. 

Cassian picked up his son, “no. We're going home tonight buddy."

Ash shook his head, "I seep with Nessa. Home here."

Tears filled Nesta's eyes as she turned around and looked at the little boy who should've been hers. The little boy who she wanted to keep little and innocent because he was everything his father had been at that age. Nesta smiled slightly as Cassian turned his brown eyes to her.

"I don't think Nessa wants us to stay here again, buddy."

Ash pushed his lip out past his teeth and pouted in his father's arms. Nesta smiled, the silence dripped with tension and something else as he hung between them. Ash looked at her, as if waiting for an actual answer.

"Stay," she finally said breaking the silence. 

Cassian's face lit up at the same time Ash's did. They looked so alike it burst something inside her heart. She smiled as he took a step towards her.

"Are you sure?" He asked softly, "I can take him home."

Nesta took Ash into her arms and he curled up, already closing his eyes. She turned and took him into her bedroom and then laid him down. She kissed his cheek and then realized how ironic it was to already be in love with his little face. It had taken Cassian months to break her. It took this little boy less than a few hours to get under her skin.

Nesta ran into Cassian in the hallway outside her room. She collided into his chest. She didn't stop, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him close. She kissed him, no more waiting, or dragging it out. No more giving someone time to break them apart.

Cassian held her close and kissed her back with everything he had. He pushed her up against the wall and realized he never wanted to go home. His home was here with her in his arms.

"Cassian," her heart was pounding a million miles a minute. His brown eyes were filled with everything she had been missing, "I know we have a lot to talk about."

She pressed her finger to his lips before he could say anything, "I don't know what's happened in the last three years. But I know that I missed you, every single day. I know that I still care about you. And I know that I forgave you the moment you knocked on my door."

Cassian's answering smile was more beautiful than anything she had ever seen, "it's always been you, Nesta. It always will be you."

"Stay," she whispered against his lips, "tonight, tomorrow. Forever."

Cassian held her close and kissed her senseless as he carried her to the couch. He kissed up her neck and back down to her chest. He kissed her everywhere he could find as his fingers wandered around her thighs. Her body arched, begging for more.

Cassian pulled away and looked into her smoldering eyes, "I will stay forever, if you want me to."

Nesta smiled as he hovered above her on their couch. She knew with every beat of her heart he was it for her. She didn't want or need anyone else. Because Cassian was the start and end of her soul, he was the spark that ignited her fire. She had spent the last three years trying to hate him. Trying, but failing miserably.

"Stay," she whispered again as she laced their fingers together. He kissed her harder, promising her he wouldn't be leaving anytime soon. 

Nesta offered them her home. Cassian would stay, for tonight, forever. He wouldn't let her get away, he wouldn't screw up this time. Because Nesta would always be his safe place to land. 

***

Nesta jerked awake and found herself wrapped up in someone. No not just someone, the one. Cassian. He snored lightly beside her, his arms around her waist, her back pressed against his chest. She smiled as she touched his hand, the blanket the only thing covering them.

The clock showed her the time. 2 a.m. Nesta let out a small breath and turned so she could see his handsome face. The face she had hated, the face she thought she never wanted to see again.  But then that hatred faded, it turned into grief and she found that she missed him more than anything else. 

She pressed the tips over her fingers against his cheek. It seemed like all their problems had been solved, all their secrets shared, in the early morning when the rest of the world was still sleeping. He came back, she forgave him.

She had asked him to stay. Her heart settled as his nose twitched. She thought of the little boy sound asleep in her bed and she smiled. Nesta leaned in and kissed the corner of his mouth lightly so she didn't wake him. But now that he was back, here in her life, she couldn't stop touching him. 

She couldn't help herself, she wanted to know he was real. This wasn't a dream, Cassian had finally found her again. And her bruised and beaten heart had been ready and willing to house him once more.

Her head fit perfectly into the crook of his neck. She was the missing piece he had been searching for these last few years. Her voice drifted over him. He was still asleep, but Cassian heard her as she laid back down against him. 

"You're still my best friend too Cass."


End file.
